Craftster Crap Part 3 Apr 6, 17:14
Craftster-Crap and random-thoughts
Before I begin I’d like to ask all you crafters (and even you non-crafters) out there going through your closet and finding clothes that don’t fit do me a favor. If you find clothes that don’t fit you anymore (or didn’t in the first place), then donate it to a good charity. They can always use more clothing and household items in good condition and you get that nice warm fuzzy feeling that comes from helping others. It’s a small thing to do, but you can also feel good knowing you won’t be raping my eyeballs. And really, that’s what’s important here. The only clothing resizes that I’ve seen that look good are usually the ones that are downsized. If you can’t squeeze your big ass into something just give it to someone who can.
Too small t-shirt, but hey, i’m stubborn
Usually when something is too small most people just give up and donate it to a charity. They don’t cut it up and add big bands of material so they can wear it. Why? Because it looks like shit, that’s why. This t-shirt is made of fail. The neck is way too high to look good on her, the bands don’t do anything for her look (is it me or do her hips look extra wide, though that may be more due to the pants and fat than to the t-shirt, but it certainly doesn’t help) and it’s got a tacky slogan on the front. Why bother trying to salvage it? Right, because nothing says fashion like reconstructing a t-shirt.
A word to the wise, if it doesn’t fit then give it to a charity. They can always use donations, don’t just cut it up and pretend like it looks good. We all know it didn’t fit you, you’re not a designer. Fuck off.
First Recon Project (be kind!) – Men’s button-down to girly shirt
Is that duct tape I see? Dude. Duct tape? I know it’s the handyman’s secret weapon and that Red recommends it for everything (including clothing), but that doesn’t mean you should put it on your clothes (I’m well aware that it’s a ribbon insert, it looks like duct tape). Shockingly enough the ribbon insert does nothing to make it look like anything but a men’s button down shirt. Nothing about this screams feminine, it screams “I’m a big fan of the Red Green Show and hai look at my duct tape.”
I get that really big people have a hard time finding clothes. That’s no excuse for using silver ribbon that resembles duct tape and remaking a mens shirt into a mens shirt with duct tape on it. If you can sew and are willing to put some effort into it then you can create some nice clothes to wear around, regardless of size.
Duct tape.
My first attempt at fixing tight jeans
No. Just no. First of all the sewing job looks like shit. The lines aren’t at all straight and it looks really bunched up in places. As I said with the shirt, if something doesn’t fit then don’t wear it. Most of the time it cannot be salvaged and it’s better off to donate it to charity. Secondly, what the hell was she thinking with the combination of navy, pink and forest green? No. Just no. Did I already say that? Too bad. If Something Doesn’t Fit Give It Away. Don’t keep it. Don’t try to salvage it. Give it to someone who needs it. Don’t want to? Too bad. Decide to anyway? Then be prepared when I start screaming “WHY, WHY GOD, WHY” to the heavens in the middle of the street.
If (and this is a pretty big if) you’re going to reconstruct something then don’t do what she did. Find a fabric that looks good (this will be hard, reconstructions such as this rarely ever look good) and keep your lines and stitching as neat as possible. It’s better to just not bother, though, because, well, look at it!
Marilyn Mon-Robot !
I get that not every woman is blessed with boobies the size of small mountains (I envy those women. Bitches), but I have to wonder why they try to pretend they have big’uns when they really don’t. Especially in this case, as you can see from one of the pictures, when she bends a certain way the fabric gapes open and probably exposes a bit of sideboob, more if she isn’t wearing a bra. This dress is clearly designed for someone with at least a little bit of cleavage, this can be fixed by making the bust smaller than recommended. There’s simply too much fabric there.
If you have a small chest I beg of you, please don’t try to fool other people into thinking you have a large chest. It’s just as bad as women with large chests trying to pretend they have small ones. Work with what you have and dress yourself accordingly.
Please.
1960’s dress from a vintage pattern
My initial reaction to the pattern was: cute! My long, lean sister would look great in one of those. Of course, my sister has a small chest, no hips and a flat butt (she’s built more like a model). Sometimes I envy her, but I never try to dress like her. She’s a svelte size 6, I’m a chunky 14 pant. I also have big’uns. Really big’uns. Because of my chest size I stay away from empire style dresses because they tend to make me look pregnant and or without a waist. The high collar also would do nothing for someone with my figure, it probably wouldn’t do much for any figure actually.
Anyway on to the dress itself. The wearer is an inverted triangle and she looks especially wide in the top with this dress on. She would have been better off going with a sleeveless dress with the band around the waist and a fuller skirt, just to even her bottom half out. The dress itself isn’t that bad, I think it looks a bit cheap. The purple boots do nothing at all for the look. And I mean nothing. It’s like weird goth meets Twiggy.
It’s also too young for her.
What the Hell is That Doing on Crapster?
Baroque Dress made from Tyvek and Target Bags
I gotta say that’s pretty awesome. Especially considering it was made out of Tyvek and Target bags. I’d totally wear it, probably to Walmart.
So ends another edition of Crapster Crap. Please, I beg of you, please consider what you are doing before you do it. Examine it inside and out and try a little harder than a reconstruction. Because really, it’s just lazy.
The first one doesn’t look too bad, it just looks like a t-shirt with black stripes on it. Probably less work to just get a new shirt, but perhaps she was really attached to that one.
The other ones are a bit of a trainwreck, though the “Marilyn Mon-Robot” is so potentially really nice. It could be just a pose problem too, makes her more boobless or something. Eww to the jeans.
Hi I'm Becky, often referred to as The Knitting Hillbilly and Pussybear, owner of this site and general nuisance. I'm a knitter, serial complainer, known whistle blower and I run the ever popular
You know, until you pointed it out, I didn’t really notice that the T-Shirt in the first picture had bands sewed into it. But I don’t think it looks that bad as far as T-Shirts go… though it’s not exactly flattering for the girl.
The second… I think I had a pair of PJs like that, but those I NEVER wore outside of bed. NEVER EVER.
The jeans: YUCK YUCK YUCK! She destroyed them.
And the last dress: really? LOL, then don’t be surprised if people mistake you for the toothfairy. :P
#1 Vera Apr 6, 21:35 Permalink